Elmo's Gone Crazy
by Princess K-Kay
Summary: It's about Elmo going psychotic!
1. Heres Johnny

Elmo's Gone Crazy  
  
(Elmo's World theme song fading in the background.)  
  
Elmo: Hello everybody and welcome to Elmo's World! Today we will be learning about Psychology (evil laugh) and self-mutilation. I don't know what you're talking about Dorothy; I'm not crazy.I'm just different. Today Our first guest will be Johnny the Homicidal Maniac!  
  
Johnny: Hello, Elmo. I love you show. I especially love contemplating your DEATH!  
  
Elmo: Well that sure is wacky.  
  
Johnny: What did you say?! (stabs Elmo like crazy.)  
  
Elmo: Wow that sure did hurt. So why do they call you a homicidal maniac.  
  
Johnny: Because I kill people you retard!  
  
Elmo: What did you call me?!  
  
Johnny: I called you a retard. You got a problem with it?  
  
Elmo: (His head spinning around like the exorcist) Elmo doesn't like the word retard. Elmo's gonna kill you.  
  
Johnny: (suddenly dressed like Michael Jackson) Just beat it, beat it, I told you niggas to beat it...(now doing the moonwalk)  
  
a/n: I hope you like it there will be more to come! Byez! 


	2. Elmo's Shame Spiral

a/n: When we last left off Johnny and Elmo were at each others necks. Please tune in to see what happens next.  
  
Elmo: (Now vomiting green stuff) Oscar! Where did you come from?  
  
Oscar: Didn't we already discuss that? Well, the mommy monster and the daddy monster get "jiggy with it" and then the daddy monster get happy and excrete something that looks like a microscopic tadpole-  
  
Elmo: Okay, I got that part, but how did you get to my set?  
  
Oscar: Oh I'm what you threw up.  
  
Johnny&Elmo: Eeeeeeeeeeewwwwwwwwww!!!!!!!!! That's gross. Hey stop saying things when I say them! No, you stop. (Suddenly Gandhi appears)  
  
Gandhi: Increase the peace and Silence the violence! Before I have to kick both of your guys' butts!!!!  
  
Elmo: (being melodramatic) that's it I can't take this emotional abuse anymore I'm leaving.  
  
  
  
Three Months Later...  
  
Elmo: (eating Millanos cookies in a "pimp" robe.) Hello and welcome to Muppets Corner. If you're wondering where I've been for the last three months I've been in rehab, because on the last episode of Elmo's World I went into a big shame spiral and when I left the set I got hit by a speeding bread truck. Oh great now I'm out of cookies! (suddenly cookie monster appears out of nowhere).  
  
Cookie Monster: Did somebody say cookie? (clearing throat on the verge of a song) C is for cookie it's good enough for -  
  
Elmo: (strangling the life out of cookie monster) Die you evil blue thing, DIE!!!!!!! Well, anyways today we will be talking about the "Thug Life". Thugs are wonderful people who sell and do drugs, some of them also live on the streets. Thugs are very happy people who have multiple girlfriends like my multiple personalities. Now we will talk about the many uses of Sporks.  
  
a/n I know it's a little wierd but you have to admit it's funny. 


	3. Rollin' Down the River

Elmo: Our first guests today are the Big Pink Emus! We may need an interpreter. So emus what do you do with sporks?  
  
Emus: (speaking gibberish)  
  
Interpreter: We chop off peoples heads. And now we're going to kill you, Elmo.  
  
Elmo: Okay our next guest is Johnny. So Johnny what do you do with sporks?  
  
Johnny: I scrape out women's' internal organs and then eat them with the same spork.  
  
Elmo: Okay, now for our musical guest Tina Turner!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Tina: "What's love got to do-  
  
Johnny: Die you evil wench, that's you got beat up by Ike; because you CAN'T SING!!!!!!!! Nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo(deep breath)oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo! What have I done? I never got to here the end of the song. ((((  
  
Elmo: I spent a lot of money trying to get her here! Now you have to perform for us!  
  
Johnny: (Singing a protest song) I shall not I shall not perform.(you get the point)  
  
Elmo: Alrigthy then, Now we will be talking about The Osborne's. They are very different people. Poor Aimee she's all alone in the world. I am going to call them to seem what they're up to. (Elmo dials the number and just keeps ringing.)  
  
Producer: So did you get a hold of them, Elmo?  
  
Elmo: No, It just kept ringing and ringing (dazed glary look in eyes) and ringing and ringing and ringing and ringing and ringing and ringing and ringing and ringing and ringing and ringing and ringing and ringing and ringing and ringing and ringing(eyes very glassy now) and ringing and ringing and ringing and ringing and ringing and ringing and ringing and ringing and ringing and ringing and ringing and ringing and ringing and ringing and ringing and ringing and ringing and ringing and ringing..........(Producer hits him with a 2 x 4) @ ___@ Thanx dude I needed that.  
  
Producer: Ain't no thang but a chicken wang. Elmo, I quit. I got 2 kids that I never spend time with. bye!  
  
Elmo: (once again being melodramatic) fine I don't need you I don't need anybody but Dorothy!!!! 


End file.
